How do you get an art major off your front porch?

Pay for the pizza!

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Pay Jokes More Pay Jokes

What Hillary's word for a bribe?

Pay her and she'll speak to you about it.

How do aliens pay for their coffees?

With Starbucks!

Porch Jokes More Porch Jokes

What do you call a man on your porch?

Mat. I neglected to mention he has no arms or legs.

What do you call an Irishman sitting on your front porch?

Paddy O'Furniture

Pizza Jokes More Pizza Jokes

What do dinosaurs put on their pizza?

Tomato-saurus

What is wrong with people?

Have they never had pizza