How do you hide money from a Republican?

Hide it in a science book.

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Why do elephants hide behind trees?

To trip ants.

Where's the best place to hide money from a Mexican?

Under a bar of soap.

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What do you call it when you lend money to a bison?

A Buffa-Loan!

What's the smallest amount of money you would reach into a toilet to get?

Mine is a skittle.

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How do you pump a Republican for information?

With a plunger.

How do you confuse a Republican?

Wrap an unarmed black man in the American Flag