How do you start a joke about Vladimir Putin?

By looking over your shoulder.

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Start Jokes More Start Jokes

What starts with "P" and ends with "ORN"?

It's "popcorn"! What were you thinking?!

How do you know when a vampire is sick?

He starts coffin...

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

What's wrong with Bessie?

She looks like she's in constant pain! She has mooootiple sclerosis

What is the definition of diplomacy?

The ability to tell a person to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip.

Joke Jokes More Joke Jokes

How many babysitters does it take to change a light bulb?

Are you joking? They can't even change a dirty diaper!

What's your funniest yet least known joke?

I have a friend that absolutely loves cheesy, question and answer jokes and I wanna make a card with a list of them! The problem is that she knows just about every joke known to man so I challenge you to give me hilarious, short jokes that aren't very widely known. Make me laugh!

Shoulder Jokes More Shoulder Jokes

What's the worst feeling when getting your prostate examined?

Both of the doctor's hands on your shoulders.

What is stephen Hawking's favorite food?

His shoulder.

Vladimir Putin Jokes More Vladimir Putin Jokes

What do you call Vladimir Putin after an ultimate fighting championship?

Vloody Putin

What did Vladimir Putin say to the Ukraine after he annexed it?

Crimean river.