How do you tell a chemist no?

Nitrogen Monoxide

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Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

Why can't you tell secrets in a corn field?

Because, corn has ears!

How many Sandpeople does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

You never can tell. The Sandpeople always ride in single file to hide their numbers.

Chemist Jokes More Chemist Jokes

Why do chemists call helium, curium, and barium 'the medical elements'?

Because, if you can't 'helium' or 'curium', you 'BARIUM'!

What do we do when chemists die?

We barium.