How do you win the vegetable race?

You need to get ahead of lettuce

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Win Jokes More Win Jokes

Who would win?

everyone

Why won't Bernie Sanders win the rational election?

Because he's two radical.

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What did justin beiber say to his mom?

I FOUND MY MICROSCOPE, now all I need is my lotion and tweezers

How many guns do the US need to combat an enemy?

Two: one to shoot and one to sell him to shoot back.

Lettuce Jokes More Lettuce Jokes

Why did the lettuce get arrested?

for disturbing the peas!

What did the Bacon say to the Tomato?

What did Bacon say to Tomato? "Lettuce get together"