How does a Chinese man start a religious video?

Press pray.

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What happens when Lucy starts using 100% of her brain?

She's almost as smart as a man.

How do I know you're not a cop -If I was a cop would I do this?

Starts breakdancing* Thats not as much proof as you think it is

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What did Picard say when Riker asked him what kind of Chinese food he wanted?

Make it Tso's Number One."

What do you call a prematurely born Chinese baby?

Sudden Lee

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What did the Chinese man say when ophthalmologist told him he had a cataract?

No, I have a Rincoln Continental!*

What do you call a Chinese man with a bad sense of direction?

Wong Wei