How does an Australian shave?

Rise up lights

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Light Jokes More Light Jokes

What's the difference between a optimist, a pessimist and a realist?

The optimist sees the light at the end of the tunnel. The pessimist sees nothing. And the realist sees the train.

Why were the Chinese trying to light a bbq grill out in the rain?

Because it was raining cats and dogs. :D

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What would happen if you ate yeast and polish?

You would rise and shine.

What do the South and the Sun have in common?

They Both Shall Rise Again!

Australian Jokes More Australian Jokes

What does an Australian use instaed of toilet paper?

Bidet, mate.

What is Australian cuisine called?

Prison food