How does Gandalf know he's pregnant?

A wizard is never late.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What do me and Mariah Carey have in common?

Neither of us know the words to any of her songs

What's the difference between an orphan home and a terrorists' boot camp?

I don't know. I'm retiring next month.

Gandalf Jokes More Gandalf Jokes

What does Gollum think about Gandalf's smoking addiction?

Stupid, filthy habitses!

What does the high elves call Gandalf?

Methrandir

Wizard Jokes More Wizard Jokes

Why do wizards clean their teeth three times a day?

To prevent bat breath!

Why is Bill Cosby like the The Wizard of Oz?

Cosby Cosby Cosby Cosby cos, because of the wonderful things he drugs