How do you know when a woman's about to say something smart?

When she starts her sentence with "A man once told me" .

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

Why did you cut me down, lumberjack?

Lumberjack: Oh, you really don't know why? Tree: Sorry, I'm stumped.

What did the Japan team say after the first half of the Women's World Cup?

I, 4-1, know we won't win."

Start Jokes More Start Jokes

Why did the gamer start working out?

He wanted to finally get respecced.

How does every ethnic joke start?

By looking over your shoulder.

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

What's a priest's favorite X-men?

A-Men.

Why was the man intently watching the bowl of snickers?

He wanted to see who would have the last laugh. back to work...

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How do you know when someone smokes weed?

Dont worry, they'll tell you.

How can you tell that microchips are made in the US and not the UK?

Because if they were made in the UK they would be called microcrisps.

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What's the longest game in the world?

Two women playing pool.

How do soldiers tell if a woman is a genuine Red-Head?

If it's red on top, fire in the hole.

Sentence Jokes More Sentence Jokes

What can you put at the end of a sentence, to make it funnier?

The punchline.

What if I took the dumbest person I know, got them severely drunk, and challenged them to finish my sentences?

inventor of Autocorrect