How does one robber ask another how they're doing?

How are you holding up?"

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What did the pirate tell his littler sister when she asked if she could hold his parrot?

ISIS

Why were all the ladies attracted to Jesus?

Because he was hung like this. (Hold your arms out wide)

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What should you do if a bird poos on your car?

Don't ask her out again

What's the difference between a tuna a piano and a pot of glue..?

You can tuna piano but you can't piano a tuna What about the pot of glue reddit will ask. Hahahahaha I knew you'd get stuck there

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What do you call a robber who looks like David Beckham?

Bandit like Beckham

Why'd the robber take a bath?

A: He wanted to make a clean getaway.