How many sound technicians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One....Two...One, Two...

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How many mitochondria does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, they're the powerhouse of the cell.

How many teachers does it take to change a lightbulb?

None, that's what students are for.

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How many lesbians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Just one, except she scissors it in.

How many married women does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Yeah right, like married women ever screw anything other than poolboys.....