What did the neckbeard wizard use to find his way around Hogwarts?

M'rauders Map

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How did they know Christa McAuliffe had dandruff?

They found her head and shoulders on the beach

Where do you find a dog with no legs?

Where you left it

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How many ways are there to please a guy?

Three way.

What's the difference between a Chemist and a Plumber?

The way they pronounce "unionized"

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What do you call a Jamaican teacher at Hogwarts?

De mentor.

How does Albus get into Hogwarts?

Through the Dumble-door