What did the plant say to the vegan?

Leaf me alone.

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Vegan Jokes More Vegan Jokes

Why do vegans hate themselves?

They are animal products.

What do Vegans, ISIS and Feminists have in common?

None of them like pork.

Plant Jokes More Plant Jokes

Why did the arborist plant new pine trees on their front lawn?

To spruce things up a bit.

What did the plant say to the other plant that it really liked alot?

let me be your *soil*mate

Leaf Jokes More Leaf Jokes

What do Trees do in Autumn?

Take a Leaf of absence.

What falls down faster from a tree, a leaf or an emo?

A leaf. The rope catches the emo.