What did the snail say while riding on the turtle's back?

Wheeeeeee!

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Snail Jokes More Snail Jokes

How does a snail win a race?

It runs against Hillary.

Why did the snail draw an "S" on the side of his car?

So that when he drove by people could say, "Look at that escargot!"

Turtle Jokes More Turtle Jokes

What's green and has four wheels?

A turtle. I was lying about the wheels

What batteries do turtles use?

Durashells

Ride Jokes More Ride Jokes

Why don't plumbers ride bikes?

Because they'd get arrested for peddling crack

What is the hardest thing about learning to ride a bicycle?

The road.