What do cats read in the morning ?

Mewspapers !

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Cat Jokes More Cat Jokes

Why do you need a licence for a dog and not for a cat ?

Cats can't drive !

How do you know when it is raining cats and dogs?

There are poodles everywhere!

Morning Jokes More Morning Jokes

Why is it so hard for an eighty year old woman to pee in the morning?

Have you ever tried pulling apart a grilled cheese?!

What's the inscription on dead blues-singers tombstones?

A: "I didn't wake up this morning..."

Read Jokes More Read Jokes

Why are so many Italians named Tony?

Because when they immigrated from Italy, customs stuck a label on their lapel reading ToN.Y.

What do you call someone who can't stop reading Nancy Drew novels?

A heroine addict.