What do Tim Cook and the iPhone 6 Plus have in common?

They both made the news for not being straight.

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Why was the redneck on his Iphone at his sister's funeral...?

He was changing his relationship status to single. Dahurpy durp Dahurpy Durp Da dUrpy durp.

Why can't a Samsung be disguised as an iPhone?

Because eventually, its cover would be blown.

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How did the wasps take that news?

God: Err...

Did you hear the news?

FedEx and UPS are merging. They’re going to go by the name Fed-Up from now on.

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Why did Tim Cook fire an unpaid intern lately?

His name was Jack

What cereal was removed from Tim Cook's breakfast?

Apple Jacks