What do you have if you have one fuzzy, green ball in one hand and another fuzzy, green ball in the other hand?

Kermit the Frog's undivided attention.

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Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

How do you stop a baby from walking in circles?

Pin its other hand to the ground.

What's the difference between dating a redhead and putting your hand in a blender?

Answer: There's always a 50/50 chance the blender isn't on

Kermit Jokes More Kermit Jokes

Why did Kermit break up with Miss Piggy?

He wasn't ready for a Kermitment.

What's green, fuzzy, and stinks of pork?

Kermit the frog's finger