What happened when Honey Boo Boo's mom lost 120 pounds?

An amber alert was issued

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Why did the aquarium have an existential crisis when the dolphins were released to the wild?

It lost its porpoise.

What's the worst part about season 1 of Lost?

The episode.

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What happened to the Oklahoma Territories?

I don't know but they're OK now.

What happened when Santa cut his beard?

The police came and took statements but ultimately Mrs. Claus declined to press charges. OC

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Why are women like magazines?

They have a lot of issues

What does a king do when he burps?

A: He issues a royal pardon.