What is long, hard and leaves a warm, white, sticky substance in your mouth?

Toothbrush.

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What's left of a garden after it catches on fire?

Chard remains.

How do you get Lady Gaga to leave you alone?

You Poke-r Face.

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What should you do when you see a blond with a pin in her mouth?

RUN! She's got a grenade in her mouth!

What did the boy tell the priest in the confessional?

Nothing. It's rude to talk with your mouth full.