What is the best way to follow a lost dog's paw prints?

With a track-tor!

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What happened when the shoe factory burned down?

500 soles were lost.

What do you call a ghost without any feet?

A lost sole

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What is the opposite of paranoia?

Thinking you are following someone.

What's the difference between a blue 7 and a red 4?

3, duh. (My ex's 9 year old little sister told me this joke, and followed is up with: "and YOU'RE the math guy!" >< Burned.)

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What's the best way to prepare a turkey for Thanksgiving dinner?

Just be *honest* with it man...

What's the best way to pack a dead person in a cardboard box?

Body centered cubic