What's the Difference between a Wife and an Attic Door?

An attic door can shut up. im going to hell

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between Tim Howard and Jesus?

Jesus had 11 guys he could depend on.

What's the difference between a green bean chickpea?

No one has ever paid to have a green bean on their chest

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What's on at the cinema?

Wife: Let me google it and- *terrified look at bill* Wife: Let me bing it and see.

Who would you save first?

Wife asks her husband: Honey, If a lion attacks my mother and I, Who would you save first? Husband: Well, the lion!

Shut Jokes More Shut Jokes

Why can't you talk to spiders who get shut in pianos?

They'll B flat

Why are you naked & why is Greg under your desk?

Me: Boss: Me: Shut the door when you leave

Hell Jokes More Hell Jokes

Why is there only a stairway to heaven but a highway to hell?

Easy. More traffic is going to hell.

What will Gene Wilder's last will and testament will say?

YOU GET NOTHING! Yeah I'm going to hell.

Attic Jokes More Attic Jokes

I started a new business making yachts in my attic this year...

The sails are going through the roof.

What's brown and hides in the attic?

The Diarrhea of Anne Frank