Which part of your body shuts down last when you die?

The eyes, cause they di-late.

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Die Jokes More Die Jokes

What doesn't float to the top when it dies?

A day old reddit post.

Why do blondes always die before help arrives?

A: They always forget the "11" in "9-1-1".

Shut Jokes More Shut Jokes

Why can't you talk to spiders who get shut in pianos?

They'll B flat

Why are there no nightclubs on Venus?

They shut down because they had a toxic atmosphere

Eye Jokes More Eye Jokes

Why do liberals travel in threes?

A: One to read one to write and the other one to keep an eye on both intellectuals.

How do you blindfold an Asian person?

You put floss over his eyes.

Body Jokes More Body Jokes

What kind of body do you want to have?

ME: *leans in close* I'd prefer human

What do Storm Troopers and Bone Thugs N Harmony have in common?

They are both going to miss every body.

Di Jokes More Di Jokes

Wherefore art thou Romeo?

Romeo: New phone. Who dis

What did Dodi Fayed say to his driver?

Want to go out with me and Di tonight?