What time does Sean Connery go to the US Open?

Tennish

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Time Jokes More Time Jokes

What time?

Mom: Anytime between 1-4. Apparently my Mom works for the cable company now.

When is the only time a woman says something smart?

When her sentence starts with "A wise man once said"

Open Jokes More Open Jokes

Why should you always knock on your fridge door before opening it?

Because there could be an Italian dressing inside.

How many men from the US swim team does it take to open a door?

Just one if its lochte'd

Sean Connery Jokes More Sean Connery Jokes

How does Sean Connery shave?

Ctrl+esh

How does Sean Connery's dog bark?

Woofsh