Where did the coffee bean find his soul mate?

Grinder (Thanks, Ellen)

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What should you do if you find a snake sleeping in your bed ?

Sleep in the wardrobe !

How'd you find out?

G:"I'm on both."

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Why do they thank me in the cafeteria when I pay for my food like I had a choice?

Just tell me "enjoy the diarrhea" and I'll move along.

What is a pirates least favorite letter?

Dear Sir/Ma'am We are cutting your internet connections for the following reasons: 1. Illegal downloading. Thank you, and have a nice day.

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Where did the coffee bean find his soul mate?

Grinder (Thanks, Ellen)

What is Ellen's favourite food?

Kung-Pao Chicken.

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What do coffee beans say to scare their friends?

Brew.

Why were the coffee beans upset?

Because they were grounded.... Or black I am not sure.