Why cant Schizophrenics be alcoholics?

because they never drink alone.

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Drink Jokes More Drink Jokes

Where do geographers go for a drink?

The Isobar

How many alcoholics does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb, and one to drink until the room starts spinning.

Schizophrenic Jokes More Schizophrenic Jokes

Why cant Schizophrenics be alcoholics?

because they never drink alone.

What do you call a schizophrenic in a white dress?

Your Holiness.

Alcoholic Jokes More Alcoholic Jokes

Why did the alcoholic quit his acting career when the audience jeered at him?

He couldn't handle his boos.

What do alcoholics and necrophiliacs have in common?

They both love to crack open a cold one.