Why did I leave my grades at the orphanage?

I couldn't raise them

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Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

How is my wife doing?

Doctor: I'm so sorry. The accident has left her in a vegetative-like state and I don't think she'll ever recover. She can barely move her limbs, if at all, and will be confined to a bed or wheelchair without the ability to ever walk again. You'll need to care for her 24/7, clothe her, feed her, bathe her, and she'll have no control of her bladder or bowels. Again, I'm so, so, sorry... ..... ..... ..... Just kidding! She's dead.

What type of dog leaves a mark?

shar pei

Raise Jokes More Raise Jokes

How many ladies have you slept with?

she said. I said, "Do you want me to round it to the nearest 10 " She raised her eyebrows and said, "OK..." I said, "Zero."

What did Redditor Jesus say to Lazarus?

I see your dead body and raise you back to life (NSFL)

Orphanage Jokes More Orphanage Jokes

Where do you hide cocaine in orphanage?

Right under the children's noses

What's the difference between an Isis camp and an orphanage?

I don't know, I just fly the drone

Grade Jokes More Grade Jokes

What are the four hardest years of a police officer's life?

The first grade.

What are the best ten years of an Irishman's life?

A: Third grade.