Because they're paid to.
Asbestos they can.
Because people are dying to get in!
With their bills!
You pay up front for both and even if it's bad, you don't get a refund for either.
It doesn't work.
Because it's too much like work what with all of the lying involved.
I can make it to the end of a Jimmy Kimmel joke without laughing.
He was making a funny face
9 polar bears (joke on a mug at work. lame, ik)
No eye-deer. EDIT: I totally messed this joke up. Please give me another chance with another joke