Why do we have to listen to a 45 second instructional to leave someone a voice mail?

Beep, talk. We get it, condescending cell companies.

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What's long and black?

every day How did Hellen Keller lose her virginity Someone left a plunger in the toilet

How Do Priests Get High?

Snorting the left over ashes from Ash Wednesday...

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What do all battered women have in common?

In a frustrated voice) They just don't listen.

What kind of music does a factory worker listen to?

Industrial Metal

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Why are pot heads always so condescending?

They always think they're higher then others

What do you call a snobby criminal going down the stairs?

A condescending con descending.