Why do you want to leave your current job?

My boss is a total idiot "It says here you're self-employed " Yes that's right

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why did the vegan avoid the confrontation?

He didn't want any beef.

Why did the carpenter join the army?

Because he wanted to be a Drill Sergeant

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

Why did the trout leave the cult?

They were too sacrifishal

How is my wife doing?

Doctor: I'm so sorry. The accident has left her in a vegetative-like state and I don't think she'll ever recover. She can barely move her limbs, if at all, and will be confined to a bed or wheelchair without the ability to ever walk again. You'll need to care for her 24/7, clothe her, feed her, bathe her, and she'll have no control of her bladder or bowels. Again, I'm so, so, sorry... ..... ..... ..... Just kidding! She's dead.

Boss Jokes More Boss Jokes

Which shampoo is that?

My Boss: This is inappropriate Me: Your skin is so... My Boss:*Turns off shower* OUT!

Why put off until tomorrow what you can do today?

Me: It'll be higher quality and less tense for everyone if we wait Boss: Today!

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Which is your favorite Monty Python Joke?

Of course, there's , but here goes mine: ...and that, my liege, is how we know the Earth to be banana shaped. This new learning amazes me, Sir Bedevere. Explain again how sheep's bladders may be employed to prevent earthquakes.

What do you call a construction company that only employs midgets?

Clearly short handed.