Why was everybody too afraid to go to the barber?

He committed barbercide.

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Commit Jokes More Commit Jokes

What do you call a disabled person committing a drive by?

Handicappn.

What crime did the tree commit to be put in tree jail?

Treeson

Everybody Jokes More Everybody Jokes

Where is everybody?

Everybody I don't know. All over the planet I guess.

What is the difference between Martin Luther King Day and St. Patrick's Day?

St. Patrick's day everybody wants to be Irish.

Barber Jokes More Barber Jokes

What does a barber yell when he plays hide-and-go-seek?

Ready or not, hair I comb!

Why is my hairline receding?

Barber: It's not. Your scalp is advancing.