How are cats like empty wine bottles?

I'm probably gonna die surrounded by both.

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Cat Jokes More Cat Jokes

Where do cats go on vacation?

Maui.

Why did the redneck take his cat to Walmart after running over it's tail with the lawn mower?

Because they're the largest re-tail-er

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

Why do they have fences around cemetaries?

Because people are dying to get in.

Why did so many black people die in Vietnam?

Because when they shouted "GET DOWN!" they all started dancing.

Surround Jokes More Surround Jokes

Why did Holden Caulfield hate his job at Sprint?

He was surrounded by phone-ys!

What do you call a black guy surrounded by 1000 white people?

Mr.President