How did the hipster burn his hand?

He was into lightbulbs before they were cool.

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Burn Jokes More Burn Jokes

What STD is found most commonly among lesbians?

Carpet burn

What do you call a burning white guy?

A firecracker

Lightbulb Jokes More Lightbulb Jokes

How many bees does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two, but I don't know how they got in there.

How many Northern Californians does it take to change a lightbulb?

Hella.

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

Howdo you stop a baby from running in circles?

Nail its other hand to the floor.

What did Jesus say when they un-nailed his hands from the cross?

THE FEET, THE FEET, THE FEET!!!