How do you get over a crush you've had since high school?

Leave the dungeon door unlocked.

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Why couldnt the NSA whistle blower leave russia?

He was snowed in

Why are you so happy?

Girl2: I was complimented on my driving today. Someone left a note on my windshield that said "Parking Fine"

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Whats the difference between a terrorist camp and a high school?

I don't know, I just fly drones.

How do you get over a crush you've had since high school?

Leave the dungeon door unlocked.

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What do u say?

SON: I WILL CRUSH MY ENEMIES ME: *nervous laughter* No, the other thing SON: Oh. Thank you

What does a 16 year old girl say in West Virginia?

Get off me daddy, you're crushing my smokes