How do you keep a lawyer from drowning?

You take your foot off the top of their head.

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Foot Jokes More Foot Jokes

Why do you fight using only your feet?

Oh, y'know. For kicks.

How would you order a Subway footlong in metric countries where they don't have feet?

By crawling to the counter " GET OUT

Lawyer Jokes More Lawyer Jokes

What's the difference between a lawyer and God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer.

Why does New York have all the lawyers while New Jersey got all the garbage dumps?

New Jersey got to pick first

Head Jokes More Head Jokes

What do you get when you give a head of lettuce to an epileptic?

A seizure salad.

What lands as often on its tail as it does its head?

A penny.