What do you call an English teacher five feet tall covered from head to toe in boils and totally bald?

Sir!

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Foot Jokes More Foot Jokes

How would you order a Subway footlong in metric countries where they don't have feet?

By crawling to the counter " GET OUT

What do you call it when you drop an apple on the ground?

A fruit by the foot

Cover Jokes More Cover Jokes

Who is the coolest guy at the hospital?

The ultra sound guy. And who covers when hes off sick The hip replacement guy.

How do you offend a vegan?

Cover your ears with your hands

Head Jokes More Head Jokes

What flies around your light at night and can bite off your head ?

A tiger moth !

When is a Pixie not a Pixie?

When its head is up a Fairy's skirt, then it's a goblin.

Boil Jokes More Boil Jokes

Why are you not able to boil water in a tauntaun?

Because they're not real.

Why do Americans drink their tea cold?

Because it takes too long to boil Boston Harbor.

Toe Jokes More Toe Jokes

How do you keep men on their toes?

Raise the urinals

What do you call a guy with a toe growing out of his knee?

Tony.

English Jokes More English Jokes

What is the difference between a English actuary and a Sicilian actuary?

An English actuary can tell you how many people are going to die next year. A Sicilian actuary can give you their names...

What's the difference between E.T and illegal immigrants?

E.T actually learned English and wanted to go home.

English Teacher Jokes More English Teacher Jokes

What do you call an English teacher who used to have anxiety?

Past tense.

Where did the English teacher and the student fight?

in the MLA boxing ring