What do you call an English teacher five feet tall covered from head to toe in boils and totally bald?

Sir!

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Foot Jokes More Foot Jokes

How did Godzilla get the job opportunity?

Some say he had a foot in the door... and the window... and the wall.

When one points and asks his friend, "Is that statue a foot?

To which his friend replies, "No, it's about four and a half feet."

Cover Jokes More Cover Jokes

Why did the oil covered seagull get sued?

There can only be one goo gull

What do you call a Russian bovine covered in lichen?

A Moss-cow

Head Jokes More Head Jokes

Where was Matthew McConaughey headed in those Lincoln commercials?

Dunno but I'm sure he made all rights all rights all rights.

How about a private dance "Okay let's go" *heads to private room* "You ready?

Oh hell yeah *we both do the cha cha slide*

Boil Jokes More Boil Jokes

What do you call a cat that has boils on its skin and can't feel it's toes?

A leperd

How do you know when your vegetables are boiled?

Their wheelchair floats to the top.

Toe Jokes More Toe Jokes

What is the difference between a sock and a camera?

A sock takes five toes and a camera takes photos.

Why did the foot smile?

He was toe very happy. Jesus that is awful.

English Jokes More English Jokes

Why are do many Italian-Americans named Tony?

When they came to Ellis Island, not one of them could speak a lick of English, but they all had "To NY" on their hats.

Why did the English majors switch to Spanish?

OC) Too many persuasive esses.

English Teacher Jokes More English Teacher Jokes

Why did the English teacher hire a midget geography nut as his lawyer?

He wanted someone who understood and case.

How is a judge like an English teacher?

They both hand out long sentences.