How do you know your girlfriend is too young?

She only puckers up for her pacifier.

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How do you know you're golfing with a politician?

When they get a hole-in-one they write down *zero* on the scorecard.

Why little girls can't fart Do you know why little girls can't fart?

Because they don't get a**holes until they get married.

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What did Santa say when he saw your mom, sister, and girlfriend all together in the same room?

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

What did the redneck say to his girlfriend after they broke up?

Its ok, we can still be cousins."

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How do you know your girlfriend is too young?

She only puckers up for her pacifier.

Why can't you hear a dog whistle?

Because they have a hard time puckering their lips the right way.