How do you weigh a whale?

On Whale Weigh Scales.

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What's the moral of the story about Jonah and the whale ?

You can't keep a good man down !

How do whales type e-mails?

With their fish fingers.

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Where do you weigh a pie?

Somewhere over the rainbow.

Why did the lizard go on a diet ?

It weighed too much for its scales !