How does a New York University psychology major turn on his lights in the morning?

By opening the car door.

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Light Jokes More Light Jokes

Why didn't the Photon have any luggage on the plane?

He was Travelling Light

How many political parties does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two, one to change the lightbulb, and the other to bask in the light of the old one.

Open Jokes More Open Jokes

Why should you always knock on your fridge door before opening it?

Because there could be an Italian dressing inside.

How many babies does it take to open a door?

Depends how hard you throw them.

Morning Jokes More Morning Jokes

Why are highly successful people named Mark always so depressed?

Because they can't stop hitting themselves. This joke came to me while I was half asleep this morning. I'm not sure how original it is. I probably heard some variation of it somewhere and have just forgotten. Any suggestions for improving it?

What does a racist drink to wake himself up every morning?

A KKK-Cup!

Car Door Jokes More Car Door Jokes

How does a blonde turn the lights on in the morning?

A: She opens the car door.

What do you call a man who opens the car door for you?

A chauffeur.