How does a New York University psychology major turn on his lights in the morning?

By opening the car door.

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Light Jokes More Light Jokes

How many guys in the friend zone does it take to light a light bulb?

None, they just stand around complimenting it, and get mad when it won't screw.

How many stoners does it take to change a lightbulb?

None, the room is already lit.

Open Jokes More Open Jokes

How does an ethiopian open a beer?

With his ribs

Why should you always knock on your fridge door before opening it?

Because there could be an Italian dressing inside.

Morning Jokes More Morning Jokes

Who could that be?

It's 2:00 in the morning. Her: I don't know. Do burglars knock Me: It depends on how they were raised...

What has everyone been using to get ice of their cars in the morning?

I've been using a discount card, but I can only ever get 20% off

Car Door Jokes More Car Door Jokes

Why did ISIS leader bring a car-door to the desert?

So he could roll down the window when it gets too hot. How we joke in Kurdistan

How does a blonde turn the lights on in the morning?

A: She opens the car door.