How long will the pizza be?

The waiter replies "About 12 inches."

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Pizza Jokes More Pizza Jokes

What were the last two pizzas delivered to the world trade centers?

Two large planes

How does Good King Wenceslas like his pizzas?

Deep pan, crisp and even.

12 Inch Jokes More 12 Inch Jokes

What's 12 inches long, stiff, full of sperm and can make a girl scream?

The sock under my bed. (I don't remember where I heard it. Can't claim ownership.)

What will they ask Jared of Subway in the prison shower?

Do you want a 6 or a 12 inch one?' I heard this joke on Bill Burr's podcast.

Reply Jokes More Reply Jokes

When asked, 'Are you Twittering?

if I'm looking at my phone I now reply, 'No. I am not Twittering,' in a sort of flat monotone. And tweet.

Why would I play something I have no chance of winning?

I replied.

Waiter Jokes More Waiter Jokes

What did Shrek say when the waiter dropped off his food at the German Restaurant?

Donkey!" (Danke) You gotta say it with the shrek accent to work.

What's the difference between a waiter and a waitress?

The size of the tip.