How many people work at your company?

About half of them.

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People Jokes More People Jokes

What is the difference between a parrot saying "E equals M C squared" and most people saying it?

Nothing.

Why do some people like to date pessimists?

All that salt must make them thirsty.

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

Why do Russian police officers always work in groups of three?

One of them can read, and one of them can write. The third one is there to keep an eye on the two intellectuals.

How many emojis will she use?

Show your work.

Half Jokes More Half Jokes

What has two legs and bleeds?

Half of your dog...I hit it with my car.

Why did the door to door sales man get nervous and run away?

He was selling In-Security Heh yeah i dunno i thought it up in a dream and I'm still half asleep bye

Company Jokes More Company Jokes

What do we call the process which usually happens after a company deliberately sells a misleading product to its customers?

DLC.

How do you know you're always about to have fun in the company of an octopus?

Because it's always ten-to-cool time...