How many scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Significantly more than zero, *p* < .001.

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Lightbulb Jokes More Lightbulb Jokes

How many psychiatrist does it take to change a lightbulb?

Just one, but it takes a really long time, and the lightbulb has to want to change...

How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb?

One, and ten people to stand around clapping and saying "Aww, how brave."

Screw Jokes More Screw Jokes

How many light bulbs did it take to screw a human?

None, there not too bright with doing anything except showing us where to go when were lost in the dark

How do you keep a ghoul from biting his nails?

A: Replace the nails with screws.

Zero Jokes More Zero Jokes

What did the zero say to the eight?

Nice belt.

What was the score of the lobster soccer game?

Zero to zero. Lobsters can't kick soccer balls.

Scientist Jokes More Scientist Jokes

Why are quantum physicists the kinkiest of all scientists?

They have the ability to penetrate both holes at the same time. explanation(http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Double-slitexperiment)

What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of Helium?

HeHe