None. They can't get up that high!
They don't bother, you can find lutfisk in the dark.
A: Two. One to change it and one to sprinkle it with Parmesan.
How many pessimists does it take to change a light bulb? None - it's probably screwed it too tight anyhow!
Just one, she yells, "DAAAAADDY, I need a new house!"
See you next month.
Because they die at the last second.
