How many times does 1 go into 0?

As Many Times As It Wants!

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Why do Polish people keep empty bottles in their refrigerator?

For people that don't want anything to drink

What's the last thing someone wants to hear while blowing Willie Nelson?

I'm not Willie Nelson."

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What did one calculator say to the other when it was time for it to leave?

Aight I'll calcu-lata

What time do monkeys poop?

Tree turdy.

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What type of milk does Bernie Sanders drink?

Whole milk because he cares about all the milk and not just the top 1% milk!

Why is Xbox 360's successor called Xbox One and not Xbox 720?

Cos 720 is 1