How often to wizard journalists get paid?

They make a Daily Prophet.

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What do you call an actor that has just paid off his house?

Mortgage Freeman

Why did the farmer's wife got angry at him for paying too much attention to his equipment?

He kept looking at his hoes.

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What do you call a Hillary supporter?

A journalist.

How often to wizard journalists get paid?

They make a Daily Prophet.

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How does a wizard keep his potions safe from burglary?

A: With a warlock.

What do you call a wizard that puts people to sleep?

Dumblebore