How the hell did you get a body like that?

he asked. "Thanks," I said, "That's very flattering." He said, "Not really mate."

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Thank Jokes More Thank Jokes

What did your husband say?

He said 'Thank you'. "

Whatcha got, reddit?

I am not funny and I need to be. I am writing a script for a short show that's formatted like "Weekend Update" on Saturday Night Live. So that means one sentence about the topic, and then one liner joke. Thank you all!

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

How do you tell the difference between a computer scientist and an aspiring music artist?

Ask them what 'unsigned' means.

What are your go to jokes?

I was at an event the other day and someone asked "So... anyone know any jokes?" What's everyone's "go to" joke in social situations?

Mate Jokes More Mate Jokes

What's the mating call of a sorority girl?

O My GOd! I am so drunk.

Why was the chess player pregnant?

Because they were mated.

Body Jokes More Body Jokes

Why was the skeleton alone at prom?

Because he had no body to go with!

When you gonna be famous?

I tell her, 'As soon as they find the bodies.'