What's the big deal about jesus turning water into wine?

I turned MY student loans into vodka...

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Turn Jokes More Turn Jokes

What's the difference between having a job and being a homeless drug addict?

One takes over your life and turns you into brainless zombie and the other one makes you homeless.

What is the best thing about gaffer tape ?

It turns "no, no, no" into "mmm, mmm, mmm"

Water Jokes More Water Jokes

How do you make Aquaman cool?

Put him in water!

What water does Snake drink?

Big Voss.

Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

What is Jesus' favorite gun?

a nail gun!

What's the difference between Jesus and the chicken that crossed the road?

Jesus died on the cross

Wine Jokes More Wine Jokes

Where do you store your wine?

In the cabernet

What's the difference between a religion and a cult?

A religion drinks wine and a cult drinks Kool-Aid.

Vodka Jokes More Vodka Jokes

What's the big deal about jesus turning water into wine?

I turned MY student loans into vodka...

How do you get 30 drunk Russians out of the pool?

Put 30 crates of vodka near the pool

Student Loan Jokes More Student Loan Jokes

What do you call it when someone gets hit by a bus on his way to pay off his student loans?

Crippling debt! It's funny because he can't walk anymore!

Why did the college student ask for a refund on his student loan?

Because his *degree* didn't work!

Big Deal Jokes More Big Deal Jokes

Why are we making such a big deal about the wheels on the bus going round and round?

They're wheels.

What's the big deal?

It's not like I did it on porpoise!