I can't tell if i like this blender...

It keeps giving me mixed results.

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What happened when Justin Bieber went to Michael Jackson's house?

Nothing, Michael liked boys.

What did the brown dwarf say to the bartender?

I'd like a Corona, please.

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What is the penalty for telling a bad joke?

The joke is it's own pun-ishment.

What is the difference between a English actuary and a Sicilian actuary?

An English actuary can tell you how many people are going to die next year. A Sicilian actuary can give you their names...

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I can't tell if i like this blender...

It keeps giving me mixed results.

When you put a baby into a blender, why do you put her in legs first ?

A : So that you can see the expression on the face.........