What candy do you give your wife before you get married?

Pre-nup brittle.

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What did the IT guy say to his wife after she complained about their love life?

Did you try turning me off and on again?"

What happens if you sing country music backwards?

A: You get your job and your wife back.

Marry Jokes More Marry Jokes

Why don't melons marry on a whim?

They cantaloupe.

How is being married like puttin' on a tin roof?

If you don't nail her good she'll be at the neighbors.

Candy Jokes More Candy Jokes

Where do ISIS fighters go to purchase soda and candy?

Allahu snackbar!

How do sheep divide candy?

They all get their fair shear