What did the cat use to sharpen its claws?

Me. Ow.

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Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What's pretty and expensive but has no use?

Leonardo DiCaprio's Oscar shelf.

Why do you fight using only your feet?

Oh, y'know. For kicks.

Cat Jokes More Cat Jokes

What do you call a cat when he first wakes up with the alarm clock?

A: Catsup!

Why did the cat befriend the dog?

Because the dog let the cat out of the bag! Haha!

Claw Jokes More Claw Jokes

What would Marilyn Monroe be doing if she were alive today?

Clawing at the inside of her coffin.

What works in a circus walks a tightrope and has claws ?

An acrocat !

Sharpen Jokes More Sharpen Jokes

Why did I carve a heart with me and my boyfriends initials into a tree?

To sharpen the knife

How does a French blacksmith sharpen his blade?

He hon(hon hon)s it.