What do you call wood-smoothing equipment that's hot to the touch?

Bernie Sanders

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What is a Catholic choir boy's favorite song?

Can't Touch This"

What's Jared Fogle's favorite time of day?

When the big hand touches the little one

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What did Bernie Sanders say when he found a dead body at a Democratic Party meeting to select candidates and decide policy?

Oh god, a caucus!" cuz he has a new england accent

What is Bernie Sanders' LEAST favorite band?

SWV (sisters with voices)

Smooth Jokes More Smooth Jokes

What do you call wood-smoothing equipment that's hot to the touch?

Bernie Sanders

Why are elephants big, grey, and wrinkley?

Because if they were small, white, and smooth they'd be Asprin.